Unlocking True Wealth: Birthday Reflections on Growth, Gratitude, and Living Without Regret

A Wealth Matters 49th Birthday Weekend Edition

Oct 18, 2024

Congratulations! If you are reading this you are also still alive! As I reach my 49th birthday today, I am grateful for the breath I still draw, and like every year that I have been granted thus far, I find myself in a reflective state.

Looking back at the lessons that have shaped my life and my understanding of true wealth over the last 4.9 decades, it’s easy to measure success by bank balances or assets, but true wealth goes far beyond the financial as I aspirationally wrote about 18 years ago in the first edition of Wealth Matters-Abundance is your Birthright.

If I could go back and share what I’ve learned with my 25-year-old self, the words in this post are what I’d say. And, as I look forward, I’m thinking about what I predict my 98-year-old self will have to share with the 49-year-old me about what I got right today and what nuances have unfolded since.

Like any balance sheet this is all just a snapshot in time of present thinking and the associated results. I welcome your comments to this post and your pearls of wisdom from wherever you find yourself on life’s bell curve.

We’re All Broke at Different Levels

At 25, you’re ambitious, hungry, and always striving to get to the summit you’ve identified as “making it”. It feels like you’re racing against the clock, eager to prove yourself. An old mentor, worth a few commas more than me then, told me around that time of my life, one of the truest things I have ever been told. “Chris, We’re all broke at different levels.”

Being wealthy or poor are states of mind. Being broke isn’t permanent and is not a state of mind. Broke is an outcome. Its a present lack of liquidity to pursue or do everything you want to do in your plan without external help. It’s a recognition of current constraints due to miscalculations of timing and resource allocation, and being “over your skis” as it relates to your ambition, creative potential, and already existing commitments. It relates to the level of liquidity at your direct and present disposal. And guess what? The risk of being broke from time to time or on a perpetual basise never entirely goes away no matter the total net worth. Much like the human body can have pristinely healthy and cared for organs (assets and systems), it cannot survive for more than several minutes without oxygen (liquidity).

Even when the money you dreamed of comes in, your standards of “normal” will rise and/or you will find BIGGER things to pursue that require you finding new levels of resources and liquid capacity to achieve or maintain. Being broke at different levels means that we recognize that the higher we go up the ladder of physical achievement, the thinner the air, and the more oxygen we need to keep going. Recognizing that if your current limit is holding your breath for 1 minute to survive and mine is 4 minutes that you getting to the point where you can do 4 minutes without a breath will only mean you now know how it feels when you need to find 5 minutes worth for your next milestone.

We aren’t talking about happiness here or yet, but we are talking about the phenomenon that every one of us regardless of our net worth can feel or be “broke” at times when it comes to what we have committed to achieve or have decided we need for some reason in our life or business.

Don’t mistake those broke moments in life for your true value or potential. Keep that fire, but don’t forget to look around and appreciate how far you’ve already come and take some deep breaths when you have plenty of oxygen from your efforts and aren’t in the grind.

Everything Is to Your Advantage

Life has a way of throwing curveballs, but here’s the secret: Tell yourself “Everything is to my advantage”.

It might not seem that way when you’re facing a setback, but trust me, there’s always an opportunity hidden in the struggle. Failure teaches us far more than success ever will. Everything in and out of our control can be used to move forward on the path we are meant to discover even if it feels like a huge setback from the path we set out upon.

The real growth comes from how you choose to respond to the unexpected. Rather than avoiding challenges, lean into them and ask yourself, “What is this teaching me?” You’ll find that the lessons from the toughest times often turn into your greatest strengths.

It’s not just about surviving the storms but learning to dance in the rain. I hope my 98-year-old self would agree that this mindset is one of the most important keys to lasting peace and success.

It’s All a Race to Nowhere, So Enjoy the Ride

Looking ahead, I imagine myself at 98, reflecting on a life lived with intention. Here’s what I hope I’ll say to myself then and maybe this list with further wisdom gets shorter and more succinct or longer. Only time will tell :)

It’s all a race to nowhere, so enjoy the ride.
Life is the greatest multi-RPG (role player game) of all time and nothing more. A wealthy life is not about the next milestone or the next big win. Those are just the ledger balances that reflect on how you have chosen to express your creative potential. Life is about being a creative because you recognize you were born into this physical meat suit with your current cognitive conscious awareness of self and your surroundings to be a player and not an NPC (non-player character) in God’s game, You and I are the derivative likeness of the ultimate creator as a micro-creator and our time here is our spirits expression of that limitless potential to create through our physical avatar.
Savor the moments along the way (the struggle and the success).
Cherish, prioritize, and honor the relationships of value that unlocked more of your hidden but limitless potential and awareness. Make a list of your top five people you spend the most time discussing money, politics, and business with, the top 5 people you share ideas of physical health, fitness, food, and experiences with, the top five people you discuss the nature of the universe and spirituality concepts with, and the top five people you discuss relationship issues (marriage, kids, friendship, parental dynamics) with.
If you don’t like the results you are getting in any of those areas UPGRADE and remove some or all of those five people out of your inner circle and replace them with people who have what you want. BE GENEROUS (without concern) with your time to the people who you want to keep around you that lift you up into the next tier of success and happiness in those domains. Be vigorously disciplined and unapologetically stingy with your time to those who don’t fit that circle.
Revel in the experiences and memories while you can still recall the feelings they generated, and the small victories that make each day worth living and illicit your sense of gratitude.

The Hardest Thing: Navigating the concept of “Enough”

One of the biggest challenges throughout life is understanding the concept of “enough.” It’s a word that sounds simple but carries immense weight. At 25, it might feel like the world is a constant ladder, each rung a sign that you’re not quite there yet. Even at 49, that drive doesn’t disappear. It’s part of our very nature as humans—we’re wired to seek more, to push the boundaries of what’s possible, to keep striving. It’s a trait that kept our ancestors alive, and today, it fuels our ambitions.

But here’s the nuance: While the drive to grow is a gift, happiness doesn’t come from simply accumulating more. Beyond a certain point, more stuff in all forms doesn’t equal more fulfillment and in sometimes it can make you less happy. Instead, happiness comes from appreciating our ability to keep growing, from seeing the pursuit as an expression of our fullest selves, not a means to an end. Gratitude is the bridge that connects that drive with true peace of mind.

The Real Risk Is Doing Nothing

If I could leave both my 25-year-old self and my future self with one final piece of wisdom, it is my personal tagline: “The real risk is doing nothing”. Growth and change are inevitable, and sitting still—hoping for better days without taking action—can be more dangerous than any bold move you might take. It’s not about being reckless; it’s about recognizing that every moment spent in inaction is a moment where the world keeps turning without you.

Taking risks, learning from failures, and stepping outside your comfort zone are all part of the journey to becoming more. The greatest rewards often lie just beyond the barrier of fear and uncertainty. And when you step through that, you discover a truth that changes everything: peace of mind and a sense of true wealth come not from what you have, but from what you’re willing to pursue, learn, and become.

You and I may never be Elon Musk or desire to be, but his impact on us all is undisputed. Just like you and I, he had teachers, friends, family, students, investors, naysayers, and others along the way that with one word, action, or comment changed the trajectory of his action to get to where he is today. You and I can have an immense impact without even knowing we did. By acting in the best of our ability and doing the small thing, maybe we are part of the reason the next Elon Musk becomes their highest potential self and changes the world.

My Final Thoughts

At 49, I’ve seen the results of ambition—both its rewards and its traps. But the real wealth is in the here and now. The joy is in the doing. Its in the building, learning, and connecting. I hope the 98-year-old me will be able to say, “I am proud of who you continued to become with this extra time you were given in these last 49 years. You weren’t wasteful. You left your world better than you found it with your creations, your sacrifices, and your generosity, and you went Mach 5 with your hair on fire til the very end in gratitude”.

Thanks for being a part of my community! Your comments are always welcomed on here.